Thursday, May 03, 2007
- I'd do her daily too. She is my screen crush. First there was Drew Barrymore from E.T. then the pink power ranger and I didn't really move on from there until Ione Sky , but I wasn't faithful to her because I also had a screen crush on Molly Ringwald (think breakfast club , 1985), I finally got closure on seeing her bbs in 1995. Ally Sheedy also scratched an itch - also in breakfast club incidentally. Time moved on and I had a brief thing for Téa Leoni, Catriona Rowntree and Winona before finding Angelina Jolie in hackers in 1995 because, well, she's got enormous lips. I only had to wait until Foxfire (1996) for closure there. But you simply can't have a screen crush on somebody über famous because you have to share them with too many people so sooner or later I moved on and in 1999 discovered both Natalie Portman and Keira Knightley who both played the same character, but I thought Sabé (Kiera) was the hotter, and thus my most recent and longevitive screen crush was born. Two years later when she got it all off in The Hole I just about had an aneurysm. I had lust for her like splinters under my fingernails. Her androgynous beanpole tomboyish cuteness in Bend It Like Beckham (2002) had me breathing very very slowly to the point I considering taking up professional stalking for a living. Next time you watch "Pirates" look for the slightly crooked teeth in the conversations on the deck -mmmm perfectly imperfect. But now it looks like it's over. She just doesn't want me any more. I'm sorry Kiera, was it something I said, please don't leave me like this, we had such a good thing. But you know, perhaps it's all for the better, you see I've met somebody else now.