Thursday, July 16, 2009

Stripping 101

Or what I remember of it, from so long ago.

Ok. Back in the heady days of uni I worked casually as a stripper. Some time in the middle of the first year I bumped into a girl I knew from first grade at an orgy. Back then she was my first crush and I think the first girl I kissed - Fiona. I recognised her instantly and was more than pleased to find that my auburn head beauty had grown into a ripe, buxom triathlete. It turns out she was working for her X, an older fellow who ran a small ‘entertainment’ company that did parties and a few other similar gigs. It started with a job as a minder, make suer she didn't get into trouble at the various gigs mostly bucks, and birthday parties. I pressed the button on the cassette and helped out with some of the more interactive parts. picked up her costume as she shed it and other stuff. Painted happy birthday messages on her butt in mirror writing (so when she sat on the birthday boy it would print on his chest or etc). They were always after ‘talent’, the money was fantastic the tips could be in the hundreds and and I was egged on to do it. What the hell - you only live once so I gave it a go.

The first night was excruciatingly nervous. I’d practiced with Fi for a few hrs that day and gone with one of the other guys to watch him preform and pick up some tips. Fi was coming to help out that first time but later I wold also work alone.

It was an 18th, the birthday girl had no idea.

We arrive - a nice house in Warrawee at the top of a long dark drive on a stinking hot summer night. Nock on the door - to delighted squeals, and step inside. I had on an army type uniform, black leather boots big belt, black beret and a truncheon. God I was full of myself but the girls liked it and it was their dollar. Ask some questions: all the way, not all the way, touch the girl explicitly, not touch etc. Her friends wanted ‘everything’. The girls father was there and we had a brief chat - he was all - she’s 18, she can do what she likes.

We moved out the back onto the porch, most of the party was on part of the tennis court and Fi started the music and I kind of started moving through the crowd, 20 or so, mostly girls, pretending to look for the birthday girl, lingering a hand on a butt here or a tummy their and getting very felt up myself. Spinning on my heals I grabbed birthday girls hand and motioned for her to come hither and slowly dragged her out to the front.

Fiona - also dressed in the faux army gear “arrested” me and charged me with not having a sufficient erection and instructed the party girl to search me all over. Much to the delight of her friends she slowly started feeling bits of me and Fiona instructed her to remove my shirt, hat (out cam the long hair) and finally feeling down my pants. As I was deemed to still not have a sufficient erection Fiona martialed some of the girls to come up and see what they cold do to rectify the situation. At one point she leaned in close and whispered to me “wana see some high school tit?” and started trying to ‘seduce’ me and flashed me then got some of the girls to do the same. Alcohol and the vibe had several of the girls suddenly rubbing themselves up and down and flashing me here and there. Fiona then got the girls to start chanting ‘get it out - get it out’ and got the party girl to get down on her hands and knees and undo my fly and fish me out of my pants. Squeals etc.

I was then released and feigned embarrassment and held my berate over myself. Fiona then blindfolded the birthday girl whilst she was still on her knees. I stood close to her and flashed her a few times then squirted a dob of canned whipped cream on the end of my cock and Fi pulled the blind down over her eyes. I then instructed her to come forward, she shuffled forward on her knees and I stepped back. Fi slipper the blind up so she could see me right in front of her face and motioned for her to open her moth and move her tong around. Squeals from the crowd. Blind pushed back down. Shuffles forward. We then quickly grabbed a random girl from the crowd with pants on I bend down and undid her fly, slipped a plastic dildo with a clip on it over her undies, wiped a bit of the cream on the end and rushed her into position in front of her friend. Meanwhile Fi was holding the blind down. The girls are screaming ‘closer,’ ‘wider’. I gave the girl now standing in my place a little shove and just as the dildo went in birthday girls mouth Fi ripped off her blindfold. More screaming.

Change of music, quick wipe down and start to dance (badly). My pants were velcro - at some point I ripped them off so I was standing there in my thong and boots. Unclip the thong and ta dah....

Music fades

gather belongings

Pose naked for photos with the birthday girl and a few others, get generally molested. put on my dressing gown and go home with a very big buzz. Generous tips.

Most nights we worked were more or less the same. Batman and Robin costume, a priests outfit, jungle / safari gear, you get the drift.,

Hens nights I earned more but the girls were uniformly fat and unattractive and never failed to proposition me. Parties, particularly for mid 20 somethings were more fun but the tips were never as good. Parents at younger parties never seamed to mind but we toned it down for the 18ths. If the girls were drinking it was usually really fun, but if the birthday girl was not into it it would go flat fast. Given that most of the act was interactive and involved the guests in some way that was kind of embarrassing. They always wanted to see you erect, always. Gay crowds were the most fun tho. We would swap in Fi for me to get the boys wooping and cheering and Fi would usually work naked too. We did many many more nights where I stripped than her tho’ which was strange but hay, just meant I earned 60% of the takings. You could clear $200 bucks a show for an hrs work.


Ute said...


when i was in my twenties, me and magnaboy and friends used to go to a place in the city..(can't for the life of me remember it's name), and on fridays they'd have male strippers, and on the saturday, female... it's amazing how well behaved the blokes in the crowd were, compared to the chicks!!

so, did you ever end up getting a boner when you weren't meant to? =p

unique_stephen said...

I don't know what you mean by 'weren't meant to' - nobody pays to see a flaccid cock. If it wasn't touching my belly button they weren't getting their moneys worth

Ute said...


there's me thinking it was 'taboo'... none of the doods who stripped for us had boners... FUCK! we were ripped off!!!

unique_stephen said...

difference btwn a venue and what we did :=)

EmmaK said...

Ha ha hilarious. You are quite the dark horse. If only you still had some pictures that you could put up of your young stud like body at one of your gigs - lol do you?

xl said...

Since you're all buffed up from the gym and climbing workouts, this kind of experience could be a good fall-back position in these troubled economic times. Sort of like your own "stimulus package."

Great post!

Spiky Zora Jones said... are so cool. I never knew.

You are right...ripe and plump is how a guy gets the biggest tips.

Me and cousin did parties (I'm talking professional here...a class act)

bachlor parties...are the funnest.

um...want you at my own personaal party...alone.

In turn I'll do what I used to do back in college. After paying security...a good night would bring me over $1200 a show.

So do I get to see your show?


unique_stephen said...

EmmaK > Not sure I have one from a gig, but as surly as pride comes before the fall I do have some ego shots from that time - why - what would you trade?

XL > Not sure what age audience I'd be playing to now. I turn 39 in a few months - gravity has had it's unrelenting way with my physique. I'd be sucking my stomach in so hard my eardrums would burst.

SZJ > So, when are you in Oz again. Off to the gym now to try turn the keg into a six pack.

Memphis Steve said...

I have to say, I never worked as a stripper. In fact, I never had a job nearly so exciting. And also, I never had the rock hard abs that kind of job requires. At least I'm consistent - I still don't have the rock hard abs.

You've had one hell of a wild life.

unique_stephen said...

You don't need rock hard abs mate, just turn up and be fun and not ugly.

I have tried particularly hard to have a wild life - particularly with regards to sexploration.

I'll write up being a life model one day.

Anonymous said...




So many mental pictures, so little time.





EmmaK said...

trade? a pic of me making love to a pineapple or any fruit of your choice.

unique_stephen said...

Jen > 'twas a long time ago Jen, a long time ago.

EmmaK > What about vegetables, an eggplant perhaps?

Ms Smack said...

Well well well..i'm loving this new blog that you're redeveloping!

After seeing your very impressive visual submission to Smack Dab, I'm not in the least bit surprised that you got paid to get your gear off.

You sexy beast!

Do you do private shows?



De Campo said...

For awhile there I was thinking I could get used to your heart warming tales of family life.

I was wrong.